A Horny Halloween | Smut Vault Audio Review

Welcome back to the Smut Vault! Checking my calendar, and while it’s not quite October, Halloween can be enjoyed year round when you work inside a windowless dank library of filth. Today’s entry is a special look at a spooky compilation presented as an audio book. Sex, potential horror, and having that information drilled directly into my ear with no way to fight it? This one’s going to be interesting. I’ve got my holy water on standby, and it’s time to take on some demons. It’s an early look at spooky season here at the Smut Vault y’all!

A Horny Halloween: Six Smutty Stories for the Samhain Season narrated and written by Jupiter Grant is a compilation of spooky-fantasy with a firm erotica twist. It would be improper to call these stories “horror” but certain elements are sure to be hair-raising or chilling. Credit is due up front for the vast range of topics spread over the half dozen tales. Whether your pleasure might be a lesbian witch demon summoning, puritanical deflowering, sex with robots, or something even more depraved, there’s sure to be something here that you’ll enjoy. Seeing as there’s a lot of moving parts here, let’s break down the review into audio and story content. Jupiter Grant worked overtime here to make this project a reality, so how does this one-woman-show stack up?

Audio

I’m not a brilliant analyst on accents, but Jupiter Grant’s British intonations are smooth and professional in presentation. The voice is appropriately seductive, but clear and without any hitches, even during the more intense moments. There’s extra care given to female voices particularly during the moments of near climax, and that might be an acquired taste if you’re not used to it. This is further complicated by some interesting word choices. One such example is with a story involving a Puritan era virgin who is visited by a Succubus. A great deal of old timey words are used to describe the nether regions of this soon-to-be-sexually-liberated woman, however it’s peppered with more callous terms like PUSSY and CUNT that seem to be performed with extra emphasis to get a reaction from the listener. I noticeably jumped at this first time I heard the girl refer to it as her “pussy” as she soon after begged the lord to forgive her for such debauchery. Furthermore on this story, the Succubus that delivers a handful of dialogue lines has a deep and masculine voice, but appears to have been the narrator’s voice adjusted artificially to reflect the character. It’s a little unsettling, but I suppose if I was a 17th century maiden who’s unsure whether she just had an orgasm or pissed herself silly…the mood is set appropriately with this narration choice.

Story Content

The six tales included in the series offer not only a range of fantasy genres, but a range of sexual appetites as well. Stories include: a bisexual witch mini orgy to summon a crop demon, a 1600’s Succubus, a party girl with a curious kink, a femdom expanding her man’s horizons (and his ass), a dark minded sex doll, and….um, one other story (more on that in a sec). Each of the stories have a clear structure with payoff, and you’ll feel as if each idea is adequately explored. I had a good time with each story, and there was something to enjoy even if the kink wasn’t my specific cup of tea. I mean, a sentient Sex doll with Amazon personal assistant qualities….who wouldn’t want to ask a partner for tomorrow’s weather forecast when your giving em the high hard one? That’s goals right there, boys.

The grand finale deserves its own brief recognition. “Lost in Ecstasy” approaches the listener up front with some very clear trigger warnings to those who may be offended by use of religious themes. Read my previous paragraph again. None of those stories came with a disclaimer, so this one was set to be a doozy. Nothing could be considered grotesque, but there’s a clear theme that involves sexual activity with an ideal held dear by billions of people worldwide. It’s uncomfortable, but in an artistic way that thankfully isn’t a cheap laugh to poke fun at religious people. What I do find even more intriguing is the way this story and book chooses to end. It’s unexpected, creepy, and outside the box thinking that is a perfect conclusion to a crazy ride across the sexual landscape of Samhain.

Verdict: A Horny Halloween by Jupiter Grant is a thorough exploration of a half dozen sexy/spooky stories that rely on strong story telling to engage the listener rather than employing intense brutality or jump scares. Even if the Halloween/Samhain themes aren’t you’re cup of tea, the stories themselves combined with the sexual elements will be a rewarding journey on their own. The tales seem expertly curated to slowly crescendo a chilling feeling in the listener with each ticking story. The looming, hair raising storytelling culminates with a last second knockout punch to make for a memorable finale to each story and the series as a whole. The unique idea used to wrap up the story is worth the price of admission alone, but that shouldn’t short sell the other wonderfully hot ideas presented throughout. It may only be February, but in honor of this compilation I’m breaking out the pumpkins early. Let’s remember the true reason for the season, and hold it dear all the year ‘round. Keep it spooky, kids.

Special thanks to Jupiter Grant for providing an audio copy of A Horny Halloween to TehBen.com for review. All thoughts and opinions are my own.
Author’s Twitter: @GrantJupiter
Purchase Link: Amazon (Audible)

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