50 MONKEYS, 50 TYPEWRITERS

It takes a lot of talent and a lot of effort to run a site of this magnitude. Sometimes it’s a little too overwhelming and I need some help to keep this monument to Thundercats hentai alive.

Let’s meet some of this talent!

img_20180705_174539-11529209652.jpgAllow me to introduce myself. My name is Matt and I write this from the great state of Maryland, in a picturesque community just off the coast of the Atlantic. By day I’m but a simple 9-5 office monkey, but by night I morph into a crude curator of dick jokes and ethically questionable erotic literature. From early 2018 I was a proud writer for PopLurker.com and made some great friends writing reviews and think pieces for the west coast nerd community.

The truth of the matter: I’m fucking stoked to get right back on the horse and start producing delicious, organic, free-range #content for a new website. From me you can expect great big doses of video games, off-color humor, and 9/11 conspiracy theories healthy discourse on current events. As for credentials: I have a Bachelor’s Degree in factory production, I’ve seen all the good episodes of The Simpsons, and I achieved the “good ending” for each of the characters in the Quantic Dream PS3 classic Heavy Rain on the first try.

picsart_07-05-052005036021.jpg

Howdy do! My name’s Teh Ben and I’m a Colorado kid who prefers to live dangerously. I promise that I have absolutely no relation to that right wing turd hobbit Ben Shapiro. I’m pretty annoyed about his sudden rise to fame mostly because it messes up people using Google to find me. Like Matt up there, I also work a day job which takes a toll on my spirit and makes me a just a little more dead inside each day.

In my spare time I like to draw comics, write articles, tell stories, and cover dogs in acrylic paint and then throw them at giant canvases. My newest collection of original dogprints have yet to be featured in any legitimate art shows.

I have a soft spot for music and motorcycling. I also host a podcast called Middle Age Middle School. Ya’ll might have heard of it. In each episode, we break down our favorite Dixie Chicks songs and decide if they could be overlaid on top of Chris Issac’s Wicked Game music video. I play video games too, but I’m clearly in a state of decline as I cannot clear the first level of Color a Dinosaur without throwing my controller in a rage.

I’m always open to new talent and blood, and if you think you have some newer, better dick jokes than us, feel free to send your resume to the email below! (Note: Please do not send me any more dick pics)

You can find my ghost on facebook, https://www.facebook.com/teh.ben

You can email me directly at greenlantern311@yahoo.com

It’s time to get this old roller coaster creaking along again!

Enjoy the ride!

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