Futanari Farms | Matt’s Smut Vault

Welcome back to the Smut Vault! We’re going 100% organic today by bringing you some fresh farm to table smutty goodness without a hint of guilt or shame. In all seriousness, we’re dealing with some themes in today’s review that if presented in a realistic context could be considered problematic. Anyone with non-consent triggers may be best to lay out for this one, and reader discretion from this point forward is strongly advised. Still with us? Great, because it’s time to take a grim, horrifying, and maybe even a little exciting look at life DOWN ON THE FARM, YALL!

Futanari Farms: Mounted and Milked by Bobbi Mare is best described as science fiction tale set against a current day backdrop. It’s immediately familiar, there’s a Covid pandemic gripping the population, and it appears to be in the United States. Other than that, it turns out we’re in for a wild one. Ben and Shane are riding through the rural prairie trying to put as many miles between them and their problems as they can. Both recently single, these two friends are as different as they come. While on the road, their car mysteriously breaks down and with no one around for miles, it’s time to take the shoe leather express. Hope is not soon lost however, as some breathtaking ladies come to their recuse and lead them back to their farm for some…well, it’s hard to explain. What proceeds is a journey into the absurd, the offensive, and perhaps for some, the insanely arousing.

I don’t really have an artistic or subtle way to describe the farm, so I’ll just come right out with it. Each of the women on the farm are Futanari, and the farm’s mission statement is to capture, breed, and harvest the men that they lure into their compound. There’s some high tech and plot convenient shit going on that makes the subjects akin to farm animals, but I can’t make much sense of it. There’s nothing to sugar coat this part of the story, as much as I’d like to. The Futa in this story’s universe possess magic sperm that have healing properties when processed through the male body (no, I’m fucking serious). Had the concept stopped there, maybe I’d be on board. Cooky crazy little sci-fi number where butt sex and cumshots can cure all the world’s problems? Sign me up. The concern with this execution comes from the lack of consent.

Of the two men from the story, one of them is a mindless submissive and all the crazy body mods and such are right up his alley…fine, good for him. The contention comes from the unwilling participant. Again, had this been a campy little number and the dude gets a dose of vitamin D and comes along for the big win? I’m down. But no, the man’s suffering can only be compared to kidnapping, rape, brainwashing, and in some bizarre way, effectively murder. There’s nothing redeeming about the non consenting scenes other than to take pleasure in the acts themselves. There are sections of this story that need to be cut whole cloth from its origin like a cancer killing a unique and possibly fun concept. Had this happened to a female character, they’d be burning this book in the streets.

Verdict: Futanari Farms by Bobbi Mare is a polarizing look at the absurd. Life on the farm is unapologetic, graphic, and remarkably uncouth. For what started with the potential of realism, including a present day’s pandemic in the blink of an eye switches to a wildly fanciful look at a sexual fetish where everything exists in a vacuum only to serve its ridiculous narrative. Is this a book for me? Fuck no, but I’m not the demographic. There’s a very clear market for this story, and those invested in this subject matter will have a fantastic time. The consenting moments are ridiculous, the non consenting moments are uncomfortable bordering on horrific. But if it’s so much of a “problem,” why can’t I stop talking about it?

Special thanks to Bobbi Mare for providing a review copy of Futanari Farms to TehBen.com for review. All thoughts and opinions are our own.
Author’s Twitter: @bobbimare
Purchase Link: Smashwords

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