I’ve NEVER Done This Before | Jenn gets a key to the Vault

2020 isn’t just a year, it also means trying some new things. The talented Jenn Coulter has lit up the TehBen landscape with some great film commentary, and she even makes Matt want to consider watching anime someday (maybe). However there’s still one thing left before we can consider her reputation fully destroyed, and that brings us to today’s assignment. The Smut Vault is badly in need of a feminine touch, and maybe that’ll convince us to sweep up around here more often. Please enjoy her debut erotica review, and if you want more Jenn Coulter, light up our twitter and spread the word to get her work better noticed. In the meantime, let’s turn our attention to another “first time,” and make some magic with one of our oldest smutty friends.

In I’ve Never Done This Before, Sorcha Rowan teaches us that sometimes, a guy skipping out on your date is actually the best case scenario. Sara is waiting for her date to meet up with her and realizes that he’s definitely not showing up. As she waits, she notices that a masculine looking woman in a suit has been eye-fucking her from across the room. Curiosity gets the best of her and she ends up buying a drink for the woman, whose name turns out to be Bev. Bev also admits that she has also been stood-up – not by a date, exactly, but by a client. Between sips, Bev reveals that she’s actually an escort. Sara, who is already massively turned on by the woman, ends up being even MORE turned on by her choice of profession. Eventually Bev invites her up to her room for some fun, and that’s when the steam gets turned up to eleven.

I kind of like to imagine that both of their dates were just stuck in traffic and then show up right after Bev and Sara leave to feel each other up on an elevator. Maybe, just maybe…they meet and have a romantic evening of their own…

Ahem, anyways…..back to the actual story.

There’s another sexy little twist on top of the whole two women hooking up with each other instead of their male dates, too – Bev is wearing a big old strap-on the entire time she’s in the bar, and Sara certainly notices it. You know what that means!!! That’s right…!

[pounding fists on table] Strap-on erotica! Strap-on erotica! This is what the people need! It’s what we deserve! More strap-on erotica!!! Bless this e-book for delivering unto us the coveted subgenre of “older women wearing strap-ons.” I feel like that’s an incredibly underrepresented market.

Actually, smut featuring an older, masculine woman is pretty unrepresented in general. There’s a lot of weird step-mom and MILF porn out there, sure – but what about some more realistic, less incest-y older woman content? I would believe in a sultry middle-aged escort eye-banging a woman at a bar way before I would believe that a lady would want to fuck her husband’s kid.

Speaking of, I feel like a lot of the “I’ve never done this before” lesbian/bi fantasies are centered on college-aged girls. You know, like, drunken roommates stuff. I’ve read a lot of fanfiction in my day (sorry not sorry) and that seemed to be where most of the “I’ve Never Done This Before” fantasy stuff went. So it’s a nice shift to see that dynamic explored with more mature characters.

Sara and Bev are really fun characters with believable chemistry. There’s some amusing dialogue between the two that develops after they’ve had sex multiple times, too. A cute line from Sara include her saying she’ll fuck Bev again once she “reassembles her body.” I also enjoyed the bit where she asks Bev, “Am I a lesbian now? Or a bisexual? Or just a Bev-sexual?”

The way Bev speaks is also quite charming. Bev calling Sara “dear” while she eats her out?! This has unlocked something in me that I didn’t know existed.

There’s even a touch of potential romance here, like romance romance. This might not be a one-night stand after all! I kind of want to read more about them awkwardly going on a “first date” after this…and maybe I want to read more about more sexy stuff happening once the date is over, too. I hope this all means that there’s some sequel potential. I get very invested in the character arcs in my erotica, okay?? That’s why I read it, for the PLOT and CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT!

This was good and steamy. I would absolutely recommend it for anyone who’s tired of lesbian content centering on blonde sorority girls, and for anyone who’s interested in smut involving older women who aren’t step-moms. Plus: hello – DID I MENTION THERE’S A STRAP-ON???! FIVE STARS!

Special thanks to Sorcha Rowan for providing a review copy of I’ve Never Done This Before to TehBen.com. All thoughts and opinions are our own.
Author’s Twitter: @AuthorRowan
Purchase Link: Amazon


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